For Columbusonian--Thanks for asking. #10

"I'm curious to see where you would have rather seen the money spent in the zoo." Now we are going to spend some, to save some. We are going to buy a tank of gas and drive out to The Wilds, where hardly any public goes, to get the sign above, because the staff should know better, off the Cheetah fence and take it into the zoo, and hang it on the Okapi fence so folks will quit pestering this notoriously shy and secretive animal. You know how "perceptions" are. I like it, so surly they must like it. It makes me happy, so surly they must be happy. I would rather be on an oasis, swimming and frolicking instead of behind bars. That would make me happy. So the animals must be ecstatic.

Now here is where we have really hit the jackpot by saving revenue. For the small cost of a tank of gas we took care of the security breach and gave the Okapi a break

That gives us the resources needed to hire a crack swat team with K-9 dogs for major events and grand openings. You would be amazed at the rift raft, ne'er-do-wells, hooligans, and troublemakers that have been spotted at such large gatherings.